Am I Ready for This? Nope. Maybe. I think so.

Dear friends:  BIG EFFING NEWS.

It’s (almost) Friday, which means it’s a day to talk about personal things (I don’t know why I picked this particular day of the week, but it seems to fit).  So let’s talk about ripping the band-aid off.  Figuratively speaking, of course.  I may share a few injuries here and there on Instagram sometimes (like last month, when Charlie ran around my ankle and gave me the absolute worst leash burn I’ve ever had), but actual band-aids are almost always gross.  So, no.  I’m talking about making decisions.

Taking the plunge.  Pulling the trigger.  Going for it.  Not looking back.

Except that I have a blog with thousands of photos in it, and I can look back at a time when I hadn’t done the thing I had been trying to decide on, and can then totally regret doing it.  But I doubt it.

Maybe it’s because from the beginning of this kitchen reno, nothing has really gone exactly to plan.  Maybe it’s just that I was eventually going to run into this kind of feeling, and the kitchen just happens to be the room in which I’ve been experiencing it.  But in the course of my renovation, this kitchen has made me the most indecisive I’ve ever been.  Ceramic tiles or glass?  Extend the tile to the doorways, or not?  Edge the tile, or not edge the tile?  Built-in bar area next to the large pantry, or leave the closet intact?  Mixed metals on the door knobs, or match them to the cabinet hardware?  Thinset or a tile mat?  Beer or wine?

Kidding about that last one.  I always choose beer.

Anyway, most of the time, these indecisive moments are fleeting & then pass.  But, perhaps, I just knew, somewhere in my gut, that something bigger was coming (remember my whole post after graduate school graduation about mentally preparing yourself for big changes?).  And I was left feeling anxiety over the not-knowing what else would be in the future.  So I kept waffling over things that are normally not an issue for me to decide.

Great… now I’m craving waffles.

Point is, when you’re not looking, life just suddenly changes course in a way where words fly through your brain and clatter to the floor.  Loudly.

The short version?  You ready for this?

I got a job offer.  And it’s not here in Atlanta.  And I decided to take it.  Which means I’m moving.

Nope, it’s not April Fool’s Day (close, and that also happens to be my blogiversary, but there’s a reason I’m not posting this next Tuesday).  I really am moving.  As in, saying goodbye to my little Ugg-Duck.  A house that I’ve lived with for four years, but haven’t really gotten a chance to live in quite yet.  Selling it and her memories (though that’s the benefit of having my blog along for the ride, my own little keepsake).  Possibly renting a new house in my new “home town” to get acquainted before buying another fixer-upper.  And starting this little DIY adventure all over again.  Further away from my handy Dad and helpful Mom, who made a lot of things on this blog possible so far.  So taking a new, big step on that and seeing if I know how to do even more of it on my own than before.

So, that means a few things:

  1. I’m keeping the blog.  Even if turning my life upside down means a little less frequency in posting while I manage to chase down all of my lost marbles, I’m still planning on keeping you guys updated on the whole process (because without the blog, this job would never have even happened;; I’ll have to write a completely separate post with more details on the whole play-by-play, just as soon as I can stop writing in circles).
  2. I’m still in a little bit of shock at how quickly things developed.  It sort of popped up out of nowhere and I’m struggling to make sense of everything and put chronological order to what needs to happen next (so that I don’t go completely insane… or maybe I am already there and just trying to find my way back!).
  3. The house isn’t at all ready to sell (AT ALL.  AT ALL.  AT ALL.  Even if I wanted to rent it out, which I don’t (I just don’t want to do that unless I’d absolutely have to), it means hiring help to finish it.  Which is a first for me basically.  A whole little mini-adventure in the middle of chaos.
  4. I’ll be working from home for a bit during the interim.  Which is also a totally new experience for me.  But who knows?  Maybe that will help speed the whole getting-the-house-ready thing along.
  5. Lots of absent-mindedly staring and blinking.  Making the ultimate to-do list of all to-do lists. (Ann Marie’s #40bagsin40days challenge doesn’t quite cover the level of purging required, but hey, at least I know what I’m going to do for Lent).
  6. Probably shedding a tear or two.  This is a good change (and something I’ve been basically working toward for several years), but one that still feels like the floor just gave way.  Let’s hope that doesn’t happen literally before the closing date.

Also?  Holy shit.  Gulp.  What?  All of those things.  I get it.  I’m thinking it too.  Not wanting to leave you hanging on just that alone, but I considered keeping things mum until I’d had it all figured out (in the way I’ve seen lots of bloggers do).  I get why they do it:  it’s unsettling not to have things wrapped up in a bow.  To have an announcement like “I got a job offer, so I’m moving, and here’s the house I’m buying!” is just sooo much more comforting.

just roll with it print

But that day could be months away, and I really don’t see a logical way of keeping silent for that long while I make these adjustments to the new job (I’m not actually taking a break in between; just quitting the job I have now & starting the other one remotely for however long the move process is going to take).  So I figured I’d try something different.  Even if that means revealing how topsy-turvy things get in between.  The mixed bag of emotion that comes with it.  Life does that.  And imperfect timings are always a thing.

And in the long run, maybe it will be better to be able to show the whole process along the way instead of hiding it?  <———– (Yep, question mark on the end of that sentence… I really don’t know the answer.)

So, my thoughts are a bit all over the place, but the mixed feelings I’m experiencing are real.  So I can at least lean on that.  I don’t feel ready to say goodbye to my little house.  But it was never my forever home, and I’ve never been a person who is all that averse to change.  And I haven’t even gotten into how exciting all of this is going to be.  So I’m going for it.  Not looking back.

Okay… maybe just a little.

Comments

  1. says

    Such amazing and nerve-wrecking news. Congrats on the new job! I can’t wait to read about where it takes you.

  2. says

    YES YES YES YES YESSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am SO EXCITED for you! Congratulations and you deserve it and you are SO BIG TIME. I am proud and pumped and I CANNOT wait to see what 2014 continues to bring for you! :) *mwah*

  3. says

    SO happy for you. Exciting things are scary and I know you’ve got this. I’m not your mom or anything, but I’m proud of you for taking the leap. And excited. Very very excited.

    GO Sarah! We are all cheering you on. :)

  4. Tams says

    WOW!!! Congrats! Very excited for you. Take a deep breath. Exhale. You’ve got this! *claps*

  5. says

    wow! congrats on the new job! it’s definitely a life changing experience moving away. will you still be in GA or are you heading out of state?

  6. Sheri says

    Congrats, Sarah! Wonderful news! I’ve secretly been hoping to randomly run into you here in the ATL so it looks like I’ve lost my chance. Super excited to hear more about your new job/big move!

  7. says

    As someone who is also moving soon (my husband’s job change happened in October) I am well-versed in the rioting emotions you are feeling. My bathroom is currently gutted, I’m living a Sisypusian life with painting projects that never end, two teenage boys to get through the school year, a house to find in another state…the list never ends. Good luck to you and I can’t wait to see what’s ahead.

  8. says

    Congratulations on your new job — I’m sure it must be a fantastic opportunity for you to pick up and move after so much sweat and tears!

    On the working from home front (something I have done for a while) — if you are struggling to focus your attention from one moment to the next (and heck, that would be me!) then you will want to map out your day a little. From my own experience, when I feel flustered by deadlines I get easily distracted and end up doing nothing at all. No cleaning, no work, no blogging, nothing on the project with the deadline. What do I do? Get muddled and endlessly write lists, plan, meaningless tidying of silly objects, starting something new, or the worst of all: surfing Facebook, Twitter and Feedly. Yikes!

    If I have a very short list of things that *must* get done that I make the night before, I find I’m more likely to do those items. Then I baby-step my way through the day.

    Once again congrats! How enormously exciting. :)
    Jess

  9. says

    When I was 28 (or something in that vicinity) I moved to NYC. I knew like 1.8 people and it was terrifying. But… I will say I have never been so proud of myself and channeled my wannabe extrovert so much. I loved having an excuse just to explore the city… I went to book readings and movies by myself and checked off favorite restaurants by myself and went on way too many tragic blind dates, but… so worth it. For infinite reasons that I’d gladly buy you a beer and get into. Sounds like you’re going to kick ass and take some names. Nerves are normal. You rock!

  10. says

    You had me on the edge of my seat FOREVER!!!!! I am so excited for you!! WOW! I can’t wait to hear about where you are going and the job you are doing. Is the job a direct result of obtaining the Masters? I mentioned to my 11 year old that you (Sarah from the Ugly Duckling House) were moving (yeah, they tease me about the blogs I follow) and she said “Boy, she must reaallly hate her house!” Too funny! So glad you shared and we are along for the ride so babble away. :) Also, definately sell it–get help, wrap it up, and move on! You will feel so much less stress if you do. Congrats!

  11. says

    Congratulations!!! I figured you were either going to say you were selling & moving or that because of all your indecision with the kitchen you have decided to pull everything out and start over. I was really thinking the next picture would be of all the tiles torn off the walls. I can’t wait to hear more about the new job and where you are headed to! Good luck organizing your thoughts and need to do’s!

    • says

      Love you too, and just a head’s up, be prepared to be in yet another post about college tailgating ;)

  12. Eric says

    Congrats.

    It can be scary, but fun. When I moved to Raleigh from Atlanta, it ended up being a great decision. I made a lot of new friends and had a pretty good time. I did end up losing touch with all of my friends from college, but that was before the internet and cell phones were so common.

    Even though you didn’t invite guesses, I am going to say you received an offer in Phoenix.

  13. Ruth says

    Congratulations! I am so happy for you and I can’t wait to read about your new adventures!

  14. Nancy pants says

    Congrats!! That’s so exciting! I’ve picked up and moved cross country twice now. Once when I was 22 to NYC from WI and then again at 30 to San Diego. There’s something amazing about starting fresh and establishing yourself in a new city. I look forward to seeing where this new job takes you.

    I’m also going to guess that you’re moving to phoenix. :)

  15. Steph says

    Congrats! Like your kitchen sign says, just roll with it. We always have to keep in the back of our minds that we aren’t the one with the plan, He is. :) It has been so fun watching you on your blog grow into the woman you are today and cannot wait to see what the next phase in your life brings.

  16. Sarah In Illinois says

    How exciting! I can’t wait to see where this takes you! Congratulations!

    I am a list-person…I would be making lots and lots of lists to get everything in order! ;)

  17. GG says

    Wowee, congrats!! Who’da thunk? I’m excited to read along through the whole transition – thanks for sharing! Where are you moving to???

  18. Susan in MD says

    Moves, long or short distance, are stressful, especially when you pair it with a new job. Hire the help, get the house sale ready and sell that puppy (er, I mean duck!)! I made the mistake of not selling my home when I moved 1100 miles away and it was SO stressful to be a landlord from that far a distance. Be done with ATL and on to new and exciting adventures! Can’t wait to hear where your new opportunity is located! Congrats!

  19. vanessa says

    Congratulations! This sounds like an amazing opportunity and you’ve worked so hard to get here. Yes, change is darn hard, but it’s a good change, so hopefully you can ride that happy tide through all the discombobulation. So happy for you!

  20. Julie W says

    Congratuations! I’ve always found moving more exciting than a hassle (unless it’s just across town, then it’s a total PITA). Can’t wait to hear all about it…I’m glad you’ve chosen to have us along on this ride. I just can’t sit on a secret that big, for that long.

  21. says

    Wow!! So exciting!! Good for you for taking the plunge and not being afraid of a big change :)

  22. Samantha says

    I’ve been a reader for years. One of the first posts I remeber reading was when I certain someone and you parted ways. I remember the (I am assuming–all that I could feel through your blog) uncertainty and anxiety about what your life would look like and how you would move forward with everything going on. I remember when you got into grad school and the fear about everything that would change. You are strong. You are resilient. You are an adventurer. You are a courageous woman. You’ve shown that life keeps moving forwards regardless of the changes and you’ve come out better on the other side. Be excited and nervous and sad. you deserve to feel all those things. But, most of all, be proud of yourself for reaching another milestone, another goal. Congratulations and good luck!

  23. Carla says

    Sending big congrats to you! I wish I had had the balls to do something like this earlier on in my life. You go and you do it! :)

  24. anna says

    i am so happy and excited about your news. Having lived in the same area for 50 years I will live vicariously through your progress. Please keep sharing your thought processes. I am anxious to hear where your new job will take you.

  25. Tara says

    Congrats! I did a similar thing 4 years ago. Exciting, scary, fun, exhilarating – enjoy and good luck! I can’t wait to follow along!

  26. says

    Go get it girl! So proud of you. I know its so scary to take an unknown plunge like that and that some people may give you a raised eyebrow or two. Just trust your gut and jump! Congrats :)

  27. says

    Congratulations! We’ve done the cross country relocation thing twice now, both times leaving project houses behind. The nice thing now is that when you go house shopping again, you’ll have an experienced DIY eye to consider your choices with. Good luck and enjoy the thrill of a new chapter.

  28. Linda G says

    So many projects completed, and so many more to go. But now, new projects in your new home city. Not to mention your new job! Congratulations, and I wish you all the best. Please keep us updated on your move and other news as you have time.

  29. says

    This is going to be awesome for you! I’m so proud and am happy that I have gotten to see you on your journey with everything – this blog, your business, etc. You have become a big deal before my very eyes! Or should I say, an even bigger deal :D

  30. Guerrina says

    Sarah, congratulations! I am very excited for you and, based on the you I now know from your blog, you will ride the waves and not be swallowed up by them! Looking forward to hearing more and seeing what you do in your new village/town/city! Great things are in store for you!

  31. Sanchez says

    Congratulations for this one Looking forward to hearing more and seeing what you do in your new city! Great things are in store for you!

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