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There is a comically large pile of dirt in my yard, and I’m reacting the way I usually do about any major DIY project: Cameron Diaz underpants dance.
I NEED TO CALM DOWN RIGHT NOW. I mean, it’s just a pile of fill dirt. A giant pile, but dirt nonetheless. It’s making me so damn happy.
This dirt pile means that my back yard is finally (!!! all the exclamations) going to get some major overhauling. It also means that a life-size Tonka toy is going to be delivered soon to help me move this pile into place and grade things out. And a group of my friends will be coming over this weekend to watch it all go down, where we will possibly make crude jokes using phrases like “dirty hoe” (or whatever, it’s not like I’ve been writing them down on a list or anything). It’s going to be pretty great.
Folks, I am literally moving the earth. I’m pretty sure that means I’m going to be obnoxious to all of my friends and speak in a loud, booming, blasphemous voice for a few days. It’s a good thing then that we’re also going to be videotaping a lot of it for my YouTube channel. I expect lots and lots of laughs… and free labor.
The dirt is here… the equipment is arriving soon… 811 has my utility lines marked off… and I’m ready to go. I’ll be keeping you posted on Facebook Live, Instagram stories, Snapchat, and maybe even Pokémon Go or whatever other of-the-moment social media frenzy suddenly decides to announce itself until the YouTube video recapping the whole thing is finished, as well as take tons of photos to share soon on the blog for how everything went down, what you need to know when doing this yourself, etc. At this point, I’m praying everything will go smoothly and that we will all have a good time while still making sure people don’t do something brainless, like ripping down my power lines. Wish me luck. ;)
Updated: Here are all 3 parts of this makeover!